Interracial dating is a whole new ballgame if you’ve never dated outside of your race before. Personally, I have always dated outside of my race so it’s never been strange for me. There are plenty of other people who never have and suddenly find themselves interested in someone who was raised in a different culture or may practice a different religion. To some, it may seem like no big deal, but to others, it might seem like a scary thought. By dating outside of your race, you’re stepping outside of your comfort zone.
So, here are 5 must-follow tips for anyone interested in interracial dating.
Respect each other’s differences
Whether the person you’re interested in black, white, Chaldean, Chinese, Canadian, Mexican, European, Arab, etc, there are going to be cultural differences. You may find that you have different religions, beliefs, languages, or traditions. All of this sounds very, very scary and foreign, but it’s not, I promise.
These differences can be small! For example, I’m white and my boyfriend is black. We both had very different upbringings, we speak differently, and we were raised with different values and traditions.
Dealing with these differences is always very interesting because you can learn so much about other cultures, but there are bits and pieces of your partner that may clash with you. If you’re interested in committing to an interracial relationship, keep an open mind, learn about your partner, and be completely willing to accept your differences for what they are.
Expect people to ask questions
Friends, family, and even coworkers who aren’t experienced in the interracial dating scene may be really curious about your new partner and your relationship. It’s definitely normal to get a lot of questions once word about your relationship gets around.
Keep in mind that not all of these questions are going to be respectful or appropriate. ONLY answer what you are willing to answer. Never feel obligated or uncomfortable because of these questions. If someone is out of line or you don’t feel comfortable answering the question, then tell them no! You are by no means obligated to share any details of your relationship with anyone.
Understand that racism still exists
Believe it or not, even if you don’t see it with your own eyes anymore, understand that racism still exists. Not everyone is going to approve of your relationship, whether it’s someone close to you or a stranger staring at you and your partner in public. When I first started dating (interracially) I was very alert to all of the stares I would get with my boyfriend when we were out in public, but I had to realize that their opinions mean nothing. If you’re happy with your partner, do not let ANYONE try to tear you apart due to something as minimal as race. That is simply pathetic. Remember, love knows no color.
Be open to trying new things
When you date someone of a different race, you may be exposed to new tradition, religion, language, food, music, hobbies, etc. There are so many possibilities, so it’s important to keep an open mind when you’re introduced to these things.
For example, my boyfriend puts up with my country and rock music while I put up with his soul and gospel music. As I mentioned, we were both raised very differently so these are things we have both been introduced to because of each other. Embrace these new things and keep your mind open.
Be prepared to be judged harshly
Unfortunately, there are a lot of negative stereotypes that come along with interracial dating. I’ll use my relationship as an example; I’m a white girl dating a black guy, so I must be trashy. My boyfriend is a black guy dating a white girl so he must be in it for the sex.
Regardless of what race you and your partner are, you have stereotypes that follow along with it and sadly, people will use them against you at some point. Even if it’s not to your face, somebody at some point will point at you and talk behind your back. They are going to judge you on something that they know nothing about, so just be prepared for it.
Being in an interracial relationship involves having a thick skin. But, never let those judgments make you change your mind about your partner. Be thankful that you found happiness in another human being. Put your blinders on so you can’t see the negativity that their judgements bring, and allow you and your partner to thrive in your relationship!