There are people that are very naturally outgoing, social, and friendly. Others are introverted, quiet, or maybe even a little anti-social. If you’re the quiet type, you might feel that your friendly boyfriend is a little too friendly and it could definitely put a damper on your relationship. You might even view it as flirting and that can be a hard pill to swallow.
My boyfriend is definitely really friendly and in the beginning of the relationship it caused a lot of issues. I worried that because he was chatting with another girl, he must be interested in her and I hated that he would make a pitstop to help a friend before we’d head off on our date. But, it was a quality that I realized would never change and I had to learn to look at it differently, so here’s how I did it and how you can do it too.
Don’t be so insecure
One of the first things I had to work on was jealousy, insecurities, and anxiety. Just because I suffer with these issues due to my past, does not mean they should be taken out on my boyfriend. I had to remember that I can’t focus on my boyfriend’s friendly actions and take them so personally, especially when they’re innocent. (Read 7 Ways To Fight Relationship Insecurities)
Always trust your man! I had trouble with this at first because of my natural trust issues, but I had to get over that. My boyfriend and I work together (yes, I dated a coworker!) and before I came along, he was quite the flirt, even with customers. But since him and I have been together I’ve had plenty of coworkers say things like “you know, it’s so weird to see him now. He hasn’t been his flirty self since you two got together,” and “he’s really crazy about you. You can just see it,” and “he’s such a good guy!” Hearing these little things helped reassure me and helped me to work on my trust. I know when I’m not there or when I’m off doing my own work, my man is doing nothing wrong. Above all, I had to just have faith in him and trust him to be the man I fell in love with. (Read Relationship Myth: Love is Blind)
Accept him the way he is
Like I said, I cannot change my man and I realized that I don’t want to! I fell in love with him for who he is, so why would I want to change him? I could either have a man who is really friendly to everyone they meet, or a man who is rude and disrespectful to everyone who crosses his path. I’ve learned to accept him for who he is. (Read Why Love Should Have NO Expectations)
Appreciate his kindness
Not only have I learned to accept how my man is, but I’ve learned to appreciate it. In the beginning of our relationship, my boyfriend told me about a female coworker who mentioned to him that she was struggling with her boyfriend so he told me that he gave her words of encouragement and talked it over with her. As an insecure girl I immediately assumed that it meant more than it did. Did they hug? Did it turn inappropriate? What did he say to her? Will she start to like him now? I learned to drop that mentality and now looking back I realize how lucky I am to have a man who is so kind to people. (Read If You Secretly Want Your Boyfriend’s Life To Revolve Around You, Read This!)
Communicate with him about your concerns
My boyfriend and I are very open about all of my concerns and insecurities. He’s made it very clear that he understands them and he is very respectful about them. He’s extra careful to make sure his friendliness never comes off as flirty because he knows it’s a sensitive topic for me. If you simply talk to him about it, you’ll feel much better. (Read How To Forgive Your Partner)
Remember that he is with YOU and he loves you
I’ve had to remember that even if he’s super social, chatting with everyone he meets, and laughing it up, even with other females, I am the one he’s coming home to. While your boyfriend may be really friendly, you are the woman he loves and the only woman he wants to be with. Those other women don’t mean anything to him. You’re the only one for him.
Is your boyfriend too friendly? How have you dealt with it?